I'm not even sure I could hold the weight of my pain without the life preserver of gratitude.

you tell me you are usually okay
you are strong
you do a lot and can usually manage it
but this is different; everything is piling up

In March, my brain was not functioning well and my body hurt so badly that I was weeping about it in my doctor's office. Fibromyalgia. 

For most of my life, I didn’t recognize that white privilege was even a thing, that a neighbor might call the police because they feel afraid of someone walking the sidewalk loving winter and having a good time with their partner. My white skin protected me from that knowledge. I’m having to work hard to learn it, actively seeking to understand the way white supremacy uses me and how I use it, mostly without even trying.